I for one am not up to the task of trying to justify my existence in this life by throwing in the towel and crying for help.
I do however feel that the way things are going in my work and my personal inattention to happiness with my profession calls me to re access my goals and priorities.
I still think there is more one can do to make a difference in this world. I also feel that feeding the incessant needs of wanton peoples and having the backlash of a company not willing to back it's product's backbone with custom expertise has a major and negative impact on all employees.
We are smack dab in the middle of an era that demands the service industry provide excellent products and the knowledgeable technicians to when needed will have every answer within their grasp.
There is nothing worse than trying to fix something that A) doesn't work quite right B) No one in the place of employment has a 100% grasp of the product C) was designed and installed by consultants who really don't fully know what there doing.
I do not in any way shape or form place the blame on any one person, natural objection would call to mind my supervisor whom I trust 100% and hopefully can emulate. Anyone saying that he is to blame would be dead wrong. He is in a major pickle as the company hasn't given him and others near him the time or the funds needed to train his personnel not to mention care for the second set of facilities.
I personally feel that the company has mis
planned (both financially and physically)for the past and current major projects and is trying to keep a listing ship upright.
This and fact I have no ability within the company to try and right and or do damage control; I have sought some refuge within a flawed by very structured system that is and will continue to steeped in honor. I feel that within my own presence I have all but faded into a facade of my former self and the discipline and honor will do me a lot of good. Besides I wish to follow those who carry honor within them rather than those who may feel honor gets in the way of a paycheck.
I also know that this negativity is choking me from my connection with my Lord and Savior whom I should Love above all things. I hope that bringing myself into this system will reintroduce my fervor for worship and trust in prayer through whatever trials and situations may arise.
The last and final reason for this is my personal desire to stay strong and healthy which the desire of doing well and maintaining myself will provide the conduit.
I have and always will maintain my affection for family time which can become ever more sacred with the advent and imminent possibility of activation.
There is nothing more personal or grave as not knowing how much time one has left on this earth. My desire to salvage every moment and make it last while placing my future outside myself will do more for me now. As I know someone can take charge of my life and say go here and do this, I also can build on my foundation of trust in God. This I can take solace in, this I can desire as the ultimate goal.